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Cowboy R's Latest Failure

I was in truck driving school.

I hated it. I felt like I was drinking from a firehose, while keeping a plate balanced on a stick. Only it wasn't a plate, it was an anvil, which could crush anyone standing under it when it fell. And people kept insisting on standing under it and laughing at the danger.

Yesterday, we got evaluated on our ability to perform the skills they had introduced us to, so far. I failed the evaluations. I could not perform the simplest task, pulling the truck straight forward and then backing it straight back between two lines the size of a freeway lane, without touching either line with the tires or the sides of the truck.

If I had failed to do this task properly in the real world, it would have meant that I hit something with my trailer, causing potentially thousands of dollars of damage, or even killing someone.

I couldn't do it. The simplest task in the school, and I couldn't do it after a week's instruction. I'd have the instructors literally right there beside me telling me what to do, and I couldn't do it.

If, after a week of practice, I couldn't do this simplest of tasks, truck driving is not for me. I can't be responsible for a forty-ton murder weapon that I can't control.

So I'm back to being part of the unneccessariat. I'll go back to applying for jobs where I can't kill someone, and hope my luck changes soon.


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 4th, 2016 01:27 pm (UTC)
Do not think of it as failure. Thinking of it as rejecting this option for your life. You are winnowing the possibilities. Another one will come along that suits your talents, which are many and varied.
Jun. 5th, 2016 04:00 am (UTC)
Oh, I am sorry :-( Best of luck.
Jun. 6th, 2016 05:51 pm (UTC)
Not failure. Just not in your skillset. But now you know its not in your skillset and can grow from there.
Jun. 7th, 2016 07:12 pm (UTC)
Straight forward? Fine. Backing up? Well... I admit that I could not do that even with a compact sedan to save my life, and would not wish to attempt juggling a trailer along with it.

Some friends once let me try driving the Van The Size of France (think Chevy Express, some dozen years ago) on a roadtrip, and when we next stopped, I gleefully switched back out of the driver's seat, because there was no way I was going to try backing and filling a 15-passenger van in a tiny convenience store parking lot to get out again!

I might try learning to do it if I could be coached slowly and gently and one-on-one for a month or three by someone very skilled and very patient. But at an accelerated pace in a classful of other people who can already do half the things I aimed to learn for the first time? #NOPENOPENOPE
Jun. 14th, 2016 04:55 pm (UTC)
Well, shit.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )


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