I made my car payment today.

Yes, it's several days late; I didn't have the money to pay it until Friday, though, and I didn't have access to a computer over the weekend, so....

Anyway, it's paid. It's kind of frustrating, making a payment on a car I'm not even getting to drive.

Tom was over at my house the other day, and we looked at the alternator, at where it's stuck. He says he thinks we can get at it; that he thinks we can do the job ourselves.

Of course, I haven't paid the registration on it, which is due Friday at the latest, so the point is probably moot.

Have I mentioned how much I hate money being an issue in my life?

Plus, I have to figure out how to pay for tuition at Pima until I qualify for nursing assistance. I've filled out the form for financial aid, but I suspect that I made too much money this year to show 'financial need.'

There's a suplementary form I can fill out when I lose my job, but that's quite a leap of faith... to quit my job, without a promise of aid there to catch me....

And, have I mentioned lately that I'm painfully lonely?

Grandmother still alive.

Still broke.

Car still on the fritz.

perlandia, I didn't see your note 'til just now. Thank you, but I'll figure something out with my parents. Yesterday's entry was mostly just dispair.

Everybody knows journals are mostly full of crap.

I have Stupid Staff Meeting in a few minutes, so I need to make this quick.

The short version is that I'm alive, but very, very busy.

The chemistry class looks like it'll go well. I feel confident about it, and that's a good sign. I'm sitting next to a really cute girl who is double-majoring in English and Molecular / Biological Chemestry. The teacher's cute and easy to listen to.

I'm not so pumped about Trig. It's an evening class, and the teacher seems a little hesitant, and I'm not sure I'm going to learn much from him.

And I'm bone tired.

Riding the bus turns everything into an epic. Just going to work in the morning requires me to catch two different busses.

I want my car back, but between rent and utility bills, I'll be lucky if I have enough money to eat for the next couple of weeks, let alone buy a new alternator.

sigh

I'm so tired of money being a constant issue in my life.

I ran the lamest game of all time, last night at sundaygames. I also bowed out of running the game for a while. Being the GM takes a certain amount of energy, and given that I've needed all the energy I can muster for taxing tasks like, oh, say, getting out of bed in the morning....

The walk to hamner's house from mine was a lot shorter than I thought it would be. If you follow the river bank (yes, we have rivers in Tucson; no, they don't generally have any water in them) it's less than a ten minute walk.

I got up and rode the bus this morning. Now I'm at work, and in a moment, I'll be away from my desk, doing the stuff I was supposed to have accomplished over the weekend.

Go, me.

Entropy is the force of destruction. The force which weighs against creation. When energy changes form, it loses quality... damn that rising entropy.

Entropy seems to work in my life. In addition to the fact that each generation of cells I create has transcription errors from the generation before them, which leads to aging and eventually death, Entropy puts obstacles in my path.

There's nothing personal about it. It just happens.

Lately, Entropy has been pushing against me quite a bit.

The problem with my car has nothing to do with the battery cables, or the battery, for that matter.

It's the alternator.

And I can't afford to replace it.

So I drove my car back to my house on battery power, after recharging it for over an hour, and it'll sit there until....

Fortunately, I have a bus pass.

Well, my car won't start. I'm not sure if that's because the battery is completely dead, or if it's that I'm still not making a good connection with the positive terminal.

I didn't actually get to Autozone yesterday. Instead, I went to the pet food store, and got ferret crunchies. It seemed like a bigger priority. Certainly, my ferrets care more about their tummies being full than about the car running.

I did take the cables off the battery end, clean the contacts with baking soda and water, and reattatch them. I'm going to see how much a trickle charger costs at Autozone on the way home. I'm also thinking I might try to find a copper washer to put between the eroded cable end and the terminal, see if that improves connectivity.

If the trickle charger for the battery is too expensive, I guess I'll let it sit and take the bus for a while, as I did today. Public transportation in Tucson sucks, but I don't have the money to go to a mechanic.

Oh, I won the lottery.

I get three bucks.

Go me.

As if everything else to date were insufficient....

I went out today to get a piece of hardware I need to fix a minor problem on one of the University's computers, before it becomes a major problem with the university's computers.

The "Service Engine Soon" light came on on my destrier.

Shortly after, the insterments on the panel stopped working.

I'm going to see if autozone has the positive battery lead I need. If they do, I'll try to get it installed tomorrow, on my day off. If they don't, I guess I'll park the destrier until I can afford to have someone professional look at it.

Why is entropy pushing so hard against me?

Tom and Terry normally have a new year's eve party. It's something of a tradition, actually.

This year, they were both under the weather, and not feeling up to doing it, so it was just the three of us sitting around, watching movies. Ice Age and Spiderman, as it happens.

Watching Spiderman made me think of childofsnow, who was the first of the fun dates I had in 2002, and the last one that didn't end with me shaking my head and trying to figure out if I was the crazy one.

Anyway, we paused the movie at midnight, and opened the front and back doors so the new year could come in, while the old year went out. Probably a good thing; I'd hate to be stuck in 2002 all over again. It wasn't such a good year for me, and I didn't pay attention to the lottery numbers or important sporting events or anything, so I couldn't make a fortune a second time through.

I was over in that part of town the other day, and had some time to kill, so I said "What the hell?" and stopped at the Mercedes dealership. (What the hell is my motivation for a lot of things).

It was pretty dead, and I told the sales guy right up front that there was no way I could afford the cars I was looking at. But, as I said, it was dead, so he stood around and shot the bull with me.

It was nice... he didn't feel like a salesman, let alone a car salesman, at all... he was just a guy standing around yaking with me about cars.

Of course, it's in his interest to stand around and yack with me about cars. First of all, I might know someone who can afford a Mercedes, and if I report to them that I had a good experience with the dealership, that might influence their decision.

Secondly, my financial situation might change, and I might suddenly find myself able to buy a Mercedes. People do win the lottery.

So, anyway, I sat in a $50,000 car. It's amazing, the difference between a $20k car and a $50k car, even without starting the engine.

Which reminds me that my battery light's been coming on. I need to replace that positive battery cable. Ugh.

Anyway. Tomorrow's new year's day. hamner and I discussed hanging for a little bit, so that's cool.

Thursday, I have to go back to work.

I need to remember to send in the rent check.

Life in the fast lane.